As transgender people gain more visibility across the country, people around the country are learning more about the plight of transgender youth. However, there’s a subset of transgender people that is not always included in the conversation: Students who identify as non-binary.
“Non-binary” refers to a person who does not identify as strictly male or female. The term may be used to describe people who:
- Identify as both male and female, or neither.
- Experience different gender identities.
There are many ways to welcome non-binary students in the classroom, but the most important way is to respect each student’s gender identity. To help, here are some tips so you can start off the school year in the best way possible.
- Using the correct name
Students of all genders and backgrounds go by names other than those on legal documents for a number of reasons…
- Emily prefers “Em”
- Dialonte likes “Lonte”
- John always goes by his middle name.
Non-binary students may also have names they prefer that differ from the name on your class list. While a trans student’s chosen name may just seem comparable to a nickname, a chosen name goes much deeper. For many trans people, chosen names may reduce anxiety of a hyper-gendered given name or may feel more accurate to their sense of self. It is critical to respect these names, as they help the student feel affirmed, welcomed, and ready to be a part of a classroom community.
Unfortunately, many schools rely heavily on legal documents that may not reflect the name that you and your student know them to be. However, a court-ordered name or gender change is not necessary for you to use a student’s chosen name regardless of official records.
Work with your school’s administration to make sure that your students feel as comfortable as possible. Ask that substitutes always read last names out loud to take attendance, print out an unofficial roster that uses the names that your students go by, or even assign a non-binary student the task of taking attendance.
2. Respect ALL pronouns
“They” is a common gender-neutral pronoun often utilized by non-binary individuals who feel uncomfortable being called “he” or “she.” While it may seem daunting to use “they” to refer to one person, it is incredibly important that you respect your student’s wishes. Some non-binary students may request that you change pronouns over time. Some may use other gender-neutral pronouns. Consider asking each student their pronouns on the first day of school which will take the pressure off of transgender students to specify their pronouns when other students may not feel the need. Allowing students to explore and celebrate their identities is essential to creating a classroom culture of respect.
If you do use the incorrect pronoun, apologize, correct yourself, and move on.
3. Listen
You can not guess a student’s identity by their appearance. The only way that you can know a student’s identity is if they tell you.
Relationships are about learning from each other, and when working with LGBTQ students, this is especially true. According to HRC Foundation’s groundbreaking survey of LGBTQ youth, students who are out at school are more likely to report being happy than those who are not out at school. Your presence as a caring adult could make more of a difference for your students than you realize.
Remember that no two non-binary students are alike. Ask your students what they need to be successful academically and socially. Set up times to check back in throughout the year as your student’s needs may change throughout the year.
Post submitted by Charles Girard, HRC Welcoming Schools Project Coordinator
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